Reading is one of my favorite pastimes. Books have been a part of my life since I was very young. I remember specific storybooks my mom would read to my sister and me. And I remember the very first beginner chapter books I read all by myself. I was so excited! I could finally read a book on my own! Through my early elementary school years, I devoured books. Oftentimes, I would bring home the next Junie B. Jones book and read it in one afternoon after school sitting in my favorite blue recliner that we had in our living room. I was beside myself when my mom bought me the entire boxed set of Junie B. Jones books, which I still have on my shelf to this day. I grew a real love for books as a young girl.
As I moved onwards and upwards to the upper grades of elementary school, my love for reading all but disappeared. This was due to the fact that I had to do so much textbook reading as well as reading fiction books that just weren't my cup of tea. I have a really hard time reading something that doesn't appeal to me, and that was certainly the case during those years.
However, my sixth-grade year found me in a new school, and it was, overall, a horrendous experience for many reasons. And that is quite the understatement. It was during that year that I began to fall back in love with reading and books. This time it was The Series of Unfortunate Events series of books that became nearly my only friends that year at school. The books were still coming out at that time, so I was reading them as fast as I could in order to get caught up so I could read the newest one. Because my school experience that year was so traumatic, those books, along with some of the Chicken Soup for the Soul books, carried me through that year. I was never without a book in my hand, and I would often choose to forego the playground at recess and stay in study hall to read. I did get kicked out several times because, technically, I didn't "need" to be in there. I savoured every minute I could get to read that year in those classrooms of bullies, unfit teachers, and incredibly pretentious airs.
It wasn't until my third year of homeschooling, when I was 14, that I finally began loving reading again. My mom is a firm believer in allowing children to choose books that appeal to them, as that is what inspires a true love for reading. And that certainly worked for me. I began to devour books again; she couldn't buy them for me fast enough.
That was nearly 16 years ago, and needless to say, my reading tastes have changed almost entirely from those days of early teenagerhood.
It is truly only in the last five years or so that I have finally discovered the sorts of books that I love to read. Not only that, but I have developed some firm beliefs on the reading life, after many hard lessons learned the hard way. My reading life has been quite a journey, much of which deals with private, personal beliefs and matters. But today I want to chat about creating a reading life that you love.
Before we get into any of the other bits, I want to start at what I believe to be the beginning. And that is, as with most things in life, you need to stop caring so much about what others think. Or what they read. This is the number one reason why I stopped watching BookTube or following nearly all the Bookstagram accounts I once did. There is a real arrogance and pretension in the book and reading world. So much of that world is about reading a certain number of books just to make sure others know you read such-and-such books a year.
Too often, in that world, people are reading books just for the sake of reading...all to reach that grand number. Then there's the whole topic of genre. People literally make others feel like crap because they don't read the same books they do. For example, I have seen many, many book people in "that world" put down people who read light, feel-good books. They call them "fluffy" and reduce them to nothing more than a "palate cleanser". My dear sweet Bookstagrammer and BookTuber, do you know why some people tend to go for those kinds of stories? Why do you feel so high and mighty when you are reading books you hate just to be able to share about them on your social media platforms, where you are, oftentimes, charging people money to be your "friend" and in turn, you share "exclusive" thoughts and reviews of books? Yeah, I don't think you're anything to write home about. I'm calling you out as a fraud. So much of the online book world I feel and believe to be fake and full of arrogance and little cliques.
Simply put...read whatever the hell you want to read and enjoy it. Period.
(Of course, read with moral integrity, but I already chatted about that a few months ago.)
When I began my journey into fiction books, I read mostly heavy books that oftentimes were intended to teach some great lesson. Many of these books greatly affected my emotional and mental health. Too many times did a book have to drag you down to the "depths of despair" only to bring you back up to see a smidge of sunshine at the very, very end of the book. I found this to be true with Christian fiction, which is what I read back in the day. Not only that, but I was seriously troubled by many of the messages and themes brought across in these Christian stories. I finally saw the light and, thankfully, found other truly lifegiving books that have found their way to my heart.
After years of anxiety and much trauma from a variety of things and experiences, such as the toxic side of religion, emotionally abusive extended family members, as well as the experience of losing my dad and having to slowly recover from everything, my reading tastes, as well as my beliefs and philosophies of the reading life, have greatly changed.
I have quite the zero-tolerance policy for topics and themes that cause me to have a lapse in my healing journey. And because of that, yes, I do tend to only read books that I would deem as light, feel-good, have happy endings, feed my belief that there is good in this world, are cozy and comforting, and even, many times, bring me further along in my healing journey. And for those books, I am thankful. For the authors who have chosen to dedicate their writing career and use their talents to write such books, I am especially thankful.
Thanks to many in the online book world, I have spent plenty of time feeling guilty for not reading "deeper" books...you can get something rich and meaningful and something that speaks to your soul from books that aren't labeled as "deep", for your information. For a long time, I would preface my explanation of the book I was reading with an entire spiel as to why I read that kind of book. My mom and sister have been gentle but unrelenting in teaching me I don't have to feel bad for reading the books I do, nor do I have to apologize for it, either. This all may sound silly to some, but I have read and heard from others with similar experiences, thanks to the online book world. And that is why I have made the focus of my book club "light, feel-good, comforting and cozy reads".
In your reading life, I not only believe in reading what you love, but truly taking the time to discover what you love. You aren't in school anymore. You aren't reading books that are required, and you aren't going to be tested on these books. So, remove any pressure or burden you feel. Reading should be fun! If you aren't quite sure what you actually love to read, poke around and read in different genres. I'm of the belief that once you find your comfort zones in reading, you don't have to consciously try and spread your wings with reading from genres you don't typically read from. If a book naturally appeals to you and it's out of your norm, that's great. But I don't think you need to consciously try to "broaden your horizons". Reading should be light and fun and delightful and comforting and enjoyable and relaxing. There's far too much pressure and expectations in the reading world these days. I highly recommend avoiding it!
Once you know what you love, it's great fun to then poke around by looking up similar authors and books to the ones you know you love. I have so much fun just looking up books and reading about them.
I always hold books up to my reading morals, which I shared about in June. And I have an endless list of books I want to read. I thought I would never find fiction books that appealed to me, much less that I actually loved, after years of reading toxic, heavy religious nonfiction. But I finally did! And after several years, I can finally say that I have created a reading life that I genuinely love. It's utterly splendid!
There are worlds of books and stories out there. Don't spend one minute longer than you must reading something that you aren't loving. That is the power of the DNF, my friends. (Did Not Finish!) I've learned that for myself, if I'm not getting into a book within a couple of chapters, I either need to put it back on the shelf until a later date because I'm simply not in the right mood for that particular book. Or if I can tell that I just don't like the story, writing, etc., or if it crosses one of my lines, I will either give it away or throw it out, depending on the content. There are far too many good books out there to read crappy ones!
In my reading life, I love cozy mysteries, magical realism, furrowed middlebrow, middle grade stories that are centered around family and have an old-fashioned feel to them, gentle and sweet and wholesome romances, nature writing, memoirs and diaries from (mostly) women whose writing I adore, seasonal reads, and incredibly cozy Christmas books that feel like sipping hot chocolate with marshmallows in front of the fire on a snowy day. I avoid books that feel heavy and topics that would deter me in my healing journey. I am very protective over my mind and what I allow to go into it...which very much includes the books I read. I have tall hedges I have planted in order to protect my mental and emotional health and wellbeing, and I am fiercely intolerant of anything that would be a step in a wrong, negative, or toxic direction.
I love sharing about books and what I've been reading. This will always be a place where light, feel-good books are celebrated and cherished, where there's never any guilt for reading a book with a happy ending and where you don't have to feel bad because a book actually made you feel good and optimistic and hopeful and comforted through the whole entire story. And if you, too, are protective over your mental and emotional health and wellbeing and want to read books that are truly lifegiving, then I think you'll like it here.
These things I shared about today in creating a reading life you love are things I am so incredibly passionate about. I spent nearly a decade of my life reading books that made me feel guilty and burdened for nonsensical things. I spent far too long reading books that did nothing but destroy my peace of mind and emotional and mental health. I read books that made me depressed, fearful, hopeless, superstitious, and just plain miserable. I did not read books that made me love life and see the beauty all around me and know that, without a shadow of a doubt, there is magic in this life and it is real. The books I read nearly destroyed me in many ways, but...then the light came, and I saw the rainbow. Books are powerful things, for the good and for the bad. I learned that the hard way. And now, on the other side, I can finally say that I am loving the goodness of reading and the positive, good power that books are in my life.
The books I share in this space are bits of that light and tiny pieces of that rainbow.
I hope you create a reading life you love, even, especially, if it includes books that feed your soul, enchant you, delight you, lift your spirits, make you smile, heal your heart, and stir up hopefulness within you and make you realize the beauty all around you and that magic is real and that you, yourself, are magic.
Books should be lights in our lives. And reading should be fun! Don't ever feel bad for those things.
Ever.
